At some point, the lines had become distorted and I wasn’t sure if I was getting to know a woman because I genuinely liked her and wanted to get to know her or because I wanted to find myself encapsulated within her nether region.
The general consensus seems to be that one should see how things are going with that person before they decide when – or whether – they should become sexually involved. If the goal is to truly find a soulmate, then what’s the rush? As I reflect on my past dating experiences, I can say with relative certainty that I wasn’t always looking for these factors in the utmost earnestness.
It takes a bit of personal work to maintain an awareness when our hormones are surging around like crazy because nature made us a little crazy when it comes to love – or more precisely the mating game.
Despite being very sophisticated and civilized, we humans are animals after all and that being said, there are a few things about animal instinct and the innate urge to mate that we seem to overlook when we meet someone special and start down that path of falling in love … The reason we overlook it is even built in and natural!
But everyone has their theories about love and what to do if you want the “perfect relationship.” And who’s to say what works and what doesn’t? He says that if you have to be employed with a company for 90 days before getting the benefits why should relationships be any different? I think that sex is extremely special and should only be done when two individuals are deeply in love.
This rule states that women should wait 90 days before giving away the “cookie.” He compares having sex for the first time with a man you are dating to work benefits.
He encourages men and women to respect themselves and each other and uses his talents, time, energy and celebrity to make a difference regarding issues he deems vital.
If only his philosophies regarding men, women and romantic relationships weren’t so problematic…
Before I do, I should say that Harvey seems like a likable guy. According to one individual, Steve Harvey, women make the rules and women decide if relationships work or not. In the book he refers to a 90 day rule that he believes works well.So if Steve says we are supposed to wait 90 days, how many of us have already broken that rule? I mean let’s get real, 90 days is a hell of long time to wait for anything. Even though this is what I believe, with my current significant other I did not have the discipline to wait 90 days. We have now been together a little over a year and I currently refer to him as my fiancé.By Courtney Edwards As a Black man, embarking on the relatively difficult task of finding a soulmate, I am consistently asking myself this one question: How soon, after meeting someone, should I become sexually involved with her? Was I just looking through the scope of rose-colored lenses? And after the deed was done, my ability to discern whether I really liked her because I felt this strong personal connection and affinity, was greatly compromised.